time out for essay shenanigans

my kids make it so darn hard to be unenthusiastic about my job. just look at these essay tidbits. they are gems.

"I like summer fruit and summer vegetable. I like watermelon, ice cream, tomato and corn."

"When winter come, kotatsu (table heater) comes in my room. I am happy. I can sleep in a kotatsu. It is very refreshing. Talk of kotatsu. I often eat oranges. Oranges are delicious."

"I like Girolamo. Girolamo came from Italy. He can play soccer very well, too and is cool. He is a bit bad father. It is cool, too!"

"Some people like living in big ciites. Others like living in the countryside like Nobeoka. Thus, people are living on the earth, so I want to live on moon. First of all, nobody lives there. If I live on moon, moon is mine. In fact, we can't live there. But I want to. Second of all, seen from the moon, you can see the blue earth. Armstrong said earth was blue. I want to see it. For all these reasons, the moon is the place where I want to live. MOON IS MINE!"

then, after i gave my australia/new zealand presentation (which featured matthew), the kids had to write their thoughts about the presentation. winners:

I want to meet Lilly's boyfriend.

He is very cool! Lilly is cute.

I feel happy when I see your pictures.

I saw you happy. That is why, I feel good.

Dear: prettiest Lilly. I was enjoying when I heard Lilly's story. I'm interested in thinking foreign countries. We enjoyed very much every day! I want to speak well! We love Lilly. Thank you for reading.

(sidenote: in japanese, matthew is pronounced "mashuu," so now that my student are aware of his existence, i'm constantly bombarded with "RIRI RIRI! MASHUU," and "WHERE MASHUU?" and "I LOVE...MASH.")

and here are the most hilarious first years' self-introduction blurbs:

Hello. If I can speak English, I'm going to go to America. Topic change! I have two young brothers. They are very noisy. I'm a little upset. I cannot study concentration. By the way, I don't like mushroom. So I'm not good health. I don't know what to write. Sorry...Anyway. Do my best. I want to enjoy high school life.

and

I want to be a teacher or shlf (chef). Because i like food. I played baseball. But, I am not going toplay. Because I like baseball but I don't play. I am a fleedam. The end

moon is mine,
lilly

krispy kreme, shanghai, and shi-do-ni

yes, my munchkin loves, the time has come! the inaugural golden week vacation blob is here! please sit back and enjoy the first installment of...4? 10? a BAJILLION? hoo hoo hoooo!

let's start at the very beginning. you might recall that back in january, mr. matthew asked me to accompany him on a voyage to australia and new zealand (a proposal that some misinterpreted to be one of holy matrimony, but nonetheless...). well, on april 22, we embarked on our journey!

we first had to bus it to fukuoka station, where kibs already had a surprise in store for me. i had no idea what to expect, and after wandering around for a few minutes, rounded a corner to see GOLDENSPOON frozen yogurt! "GOLDENSPOON?!" i shrieked.

then, following matt's gaze, my eyes fell upon It--the crowned jewel of american junk food. the Mecca of all things sweet and greasy. the golden hope for all who hunger and thirst for righteousness among donuts. krispy kreme.

my heart stopped (in anticipation of the cholesterol?).

we waited in line with the others, and i wolfed my free, hot circle of glazed heaven in utter bliss. then, matt and i bought a half dozen, which we proceeded to eat over the next 12 hours.

it was all downhill after that. we flew to shanghai, where we had to go through a ridiculous, circumlocutory hour long immigration process instead of just transferring flights like normal people. all was remedied by our beloved krispies.

hilariously, as we waited in line to board the plane to sydney, we spotted adheesh, another jet, waiting to board his flight to india. fancy running into someone familiar in china!

the flight was 12 hours. we took ambien, which knocked a good 8 hours off the flight for me. thanks for the drugs, mom and dad!

finally--finally! we arrived in sydney on the morning of april 23, after a good 24 hours of traveling. immediately, the ease of being in a english-speaking country hit us. we bought train tickets with no hassle, and subwayed it to downtown syd.

we had booked the hyde part hotel, a swanky place, for the night. though it was rainy out, our spirits couldn't be dampened by the excitement of beginning our vacay. we dropped our bags at the hotel, and bustled down the street to find some food. ended up at a cute little cafe, split some lasagne, and lunched with relish. also, matt had his first coke in weeks (lenten promise), so he was a very happy man.

we spent our first day jaunting about in the rain. walked all around hyde park, through shopping districts, and down to "darling harbour," where there were street performers, merry-makers, and overpriced souvenirs. it was grand!

australian bird!

being a poser in darling harbour

hungry again, and wanting to get back to familiar sights before all the freaks came out at night (unlucky, sydney's fulla dem), we headed to our hotel to inquire about eateries. the front desk dude, taken by my american charms, kindly recommended china-koreatown nearby. sidenote: since i usually depend on matt to communicate while in japan, he handed me the reins for australia and new zealand. i relied heavily on my innocent smile to get us what we wanted! aka my smile probably did nothing for us.

we hit up a korean joint called "best friends" for dinner, lured in by the tempting picture menu. we both got bulgogi dishes, and happily noshed the delicious non-japanese dishes. day 1: success.

the next morning, it was easter! and matthew was a very acquiescent protestant, agreeing to come to mass with me. HAAALLELUJAH!

we went to a huge cathedral right by our hotel called st. mary's. we entered as another easter mass was finishing, and were squished in with scores of other people waiting ravenously for the good seats to open up. after about 10 minutes, mass ended, and we jostled with the others towards the front.

we were joined soon by a lovely australian older mother and son, who chatted with us about our travels. then a few minutes later, their rather large female friend squished into our already full pew. wedged against me, she began berating us about our travels. here's how a snippet of our convo went:

me: "yeah, so we'll be in melbourne for four days."
lady: "oh, when do you leave?"
me: "tonight."
lady: "no, when do you leave melbourne."
me: "wednesday."
lady, suddenly angry: "four days? FOUR DAYS?! how is THAT four days?"
me: *stammers*
matt, saving me: well, if you count today, too.
lady, in a huff: well.

she spent all of mass glaring at nearby children who were playing on the floor. happily for me, she had confided before mass that she wasn't catholic, so i didn't feel embarrassed fo' ma people. she had come for the music, which incidentally, was amazing. the church has a celebrated men & boys choir which led the entire mass in absolutely gorgeous music. i couldn't have been happier! and apparently, as told to me by Angry Lady, the priest there is widely considered to be in the running to be pope one day. heyo! if he ever makes it to the papal office of infallibility, i can cross him off my pope-watching list. jp2 and benedict are the only two so far!

anywhoodle, the mass was lovely, and afterward we spilled with the others into the beautiful, sunshiny streets. it was warm and gorgeous out, so we opted to walk the coastal path down to the opera house. here's what we saw along the way!

museum, which we returned to during sydney, round 2

dem boats

aha! and there it was! the iconic opera house. it looked so pristine, perched on the sparkling water, that we decided that we should eat lunch while enjoying the view. we spotted a food stand nearby, got two cokes and flaky meat pies, and sat on a bench to gaze at the harbour and house while messily eating.

and we took pictures!

we then sauntered down to the park that stretched alongside the path to the opera house. there were statues, peeps picnicing, and a boy with far too much hair struttin' his stuff.

you can almost hear the 1970's boogie music accompanying this photo.

anyways, after taking way too many pictures (most of which are too silly to put on here!), we arrived!

i began to sing puccini, then someone threw a tomato at me

yay!

after sufficiently admiring the opera house (and snarking all of the other tourists there), we had a very long wander all around the streets nearby. the place was full of great street performers, of all kinds! we also weaved through an artisan market, got lost in a residential area, popped back to where we started, and got subway for dinner.

we sat at a little table outside subway, just tucking into our sandwiches, when a yelping homeless man tottered up to us. he began screaming nonsensically, throwing in cusses for good measure, as everyone nearby stared. neither of us did anything, really, but he continued to holler. finally, he walked around to matt, clapped him on the back, and said, "now you do the right thing...take this young lady and marry her at st. andrew's!"

and with that, he wobbled away.

and that was sydney.

fondly,
lilly

i was just gonna read about nazis and watch the sopranos

yesterdai was my birthday, and a very good one at that! i treated myself to a special brek of shinamon tosuto (cinnamon toast, get with it, ladies), then jaunted into school. I had no classes, but spent the day in prep for my trip presentation. i also had to do a write-up of einstein’s life for one of the upper classes. while i was “researching” (skimming wikipedia), of course a torrent of stuff about wwII came up.

since i (of course) got sidetracked, i ended up looking at a bunch of articles on ss men and the like. it was really interesting! after school, i was prepared to go home, get into comfy clothes, put a fatty stack of reese’s next to my bed, and learn more horrific and random tidbits. um, did anyone know hitler was possibly a vegetarian? SHOCKU!!

anyways, i had just washed maself when trotsky came over with some birthday regalia, which included homemade cookies, foreign foodstuffs, and, my favorite—foot knickers (cute socks). we were chatting it up, when, BING BONG! my doorbell rang. my heart raced! could it be?

I scampered to the peephole, and saw nothing save a curly lock dangling in the periphery. mattsy had driven up! YATTA!

it was so sweet and exciting, and he even took me fo’ aisu-kurimu at baskin robbins. what a good boy! and i had a lovely skype with my parents and got adorable cards from my aunt laura and grammy, and an AMAZING stash of cosmetics from my aunt claire. good haul, great burfday!

and the festivities shall not end here – big pawty this weekend in miyazaki city featuring all of our favorite characters. its bound to end in some sort of explosion.

anyways, that’s all the bday news. thanks to everyone for making it such a good one.

not feeling 23,

riri

just when i thought i was out...they pulled me back in!

I'M BAQ. posts about the trip are forthcoming, but for now, allow me to please share exactly why i think japanese people are the nicest and funniest ever.

a few weeks ago, on the eve of our traveling saga, i called a cab to take me to the train station. i was catching a train to takanabe, where i'd be meeting up with kibbuh and friends for a last supper (pun alert, it was holy thursday) before our departure. the takushi came to pick me up, and i was pleasantly surprised to see it was a jolly old man who has driven me before. i actually often get repeats, because i always take taxis at the same time - friday afternoons. some drivers will be really chatty and curious with me, which usually results in gross miscommunication, me asking them to repeat themselves several times, them telling me i'm good at japanese, and much "heeeeeee" all around. some drivers don't talk to me at all, which is fine, too.

this particular driver, though, is hilarious. he'll ask me something, then when i respond in broken japanese, will giggle like a little girl, prompting me to giggle, too! so we basically giggled our whole way to the train station. then, when i gave him my point card to stamp, i realized it was full, aka waribiki (discount) time. but when i went to pay, it was full fare. i didn't understand, but didn't really care, so i paid, lugged my suitcases up the station stairs, and bustled onto my train. i had settled into my seat only a few minutes before the train was scheduled to leave, and was just popping in my headphones when one of the conductors bumbled towards me, spluttering about takushi (taxi). everyone turned to look as i dumbfoundedly tried to understand. two seconds later, my beloved taxi driver lurched onto the train, sweatily huffed towards me while bowing, and thrust a fistful of change into my hands. "pointo ka-do asldkjflskjfdlkjf" he gasped, and i could only grin my gai-jin grin and thank him in complete shock. he had clearly realized he hadn't given me the discount, asked the conductor to get on the train, and sprinted to make it in time. after forcing me to accept the money, he jumped off the train, the doors closed, and the train departed 5 seconds later.

then, the other day, i was walking home from school, haggard in the sticky humidity. a taxi pulled up next to me. i thought, "whats this clown doing," then was startled when the driver honked. i looked inside, and it was the jolly old man!! he popped open the door, and i said hello in surprise, and asked him how he was. he giggled and jabbered a lot in japanese, then thrust MORE MONEY into my hands, saying something about point card change. i didn't know what to do, or what was going on, so i took the money and thanked him yet again. the whole thing was just preposterously cute. i can't believe he even remembered! and went to the trouble of giving me the exact discount, three weeks later, on the street. japan, honestly, sometimes you break my heart.

oh yeah, and on a random side note, there's a teacher at my school who was afraid to talk to me, until a month ago when we all got drunk at a dinner. he then confessed that i look like jessica alba (racist?), and that to him i'm like a movie star (BIGGEST LOL OF MY LIFE). since then, at school he doesn't really talk to me, but will silently leave bottles of apple juice on my desk as little presents. i always thank him, but last week i gave him some american candy to return the gesture a little. he was so obviously embarrassed, and the whole thing was incredibly awkward as i handed him sweets, and it just makes me crack up. now i'm wondering if i effectively just kissed all those free apple juices good-bye.

amused and confused,
riri