the bane of my existence

look out, cheerful chelsea! here comes negative nancy!

has it happened? have i finally exhausted all of my happy "stage one culture shock" emotions, and haplessly landed into "stage two," aka the stage of bitterness, disappointment, isolation and unwarranted rage?

no, luckily i haven't! but there is one thing, one horrible, soul-sucking, spirit-crushing, heart-stomping thing that essentially ruins my life several times per week.

the copier.

copy machines are dakota pieces of crap to begin with. they make no sense in any language. they are temperamental and fussy, get constipated, whine, cry, break for no reason, and commit general crimes against humanity.

and when the screen's in japanese, things just get worse.

i have no idea what the heck i'm doing when i go into the infernal copy room. every time, i cross my fingers that no on else is in there, so that they won't see that i have to do at least three or four "do-overs" before i get it right.

but, unfortunately, there's always this one lady who's in there, just waiting for me to fudge it. at first, she watches me out of the corners of her eyes, then shifts to blatantly staring at me in silence while i inevitably break the machine. i never know what i do wrong. i'll have printed 20 copies, when in the middle of it, the damn thing stops and makes retching noises. i'll then sneak a glance at her. she's always just gazing at me with unmasked contempt!

then, i gather my breath and courage, and squeak in my pitiful japanese: "sumimasen. gomennasai. misete, kudasai" (excuse me. i'm sorry. show me, please.) she'll then press a dizzying series of buttons, replace the paper, jostle the ink, and do a number of other tasks i would never think to do. i thank her profusely, and she gives a little half-smile. it's effing killer! and it's happened FOUR TIMES already!

however, that is really the only thing i have to complain about...so i'm sorry for the downer-ness of it all!

in other news, i had a lovely weekend in miyazaki city. on friday, i stayed at darling carmen's after demolishing an epic izakaya dinner with her, and on saturday i judged the debate contest with about 15 other JETs. sunday, irish matt and i malled it, and i finally picked out an electric piano for my apartment! cleverly, he suggested that i order one online since i found the perfect model at the mall. i did so this afternoon!

i cannot effing wait for it to arrive this week. i feel like i'm going to grow exponentially as a pianist this year, since i have little else to do after work (when it rains i can't run, and i can only read so much poetry every day). and i have lots of room to grow, obviously, so that's all gravy!

this afternoon, after trying in vain to pick myself up with a few cups of tea post-work (i was dragging hardcore today), i rallied by trying on my old ginger spice costume and figuring out my outfit for saturday's halloween party. many inappropriate pictures to come!

i've started to create a pros and cons list for staying on another year. among the pros are "enjoyable work," "travel opportunities," "learning more japanese," and among the cons are "body deteriorating due to lack of nutrition and overconsumption of white rice and milk tea," "no one to braid my hair (jencat...where are you?)," and "delaying real life." topping the list, of course, is "missing...everyone."

and it's true. i am still very happy, bright-eyed and bushy-tailed here, and many things continue to seem fresh and new. but now the homesickness is hunkering down, too. please know that you are missed, and loved, immensely, way over here on the other side of the world.

yearning for real halloween, getting ready with the cats, yogurtland, sunsets, english-filled libraries, downtown LA, forever 21, and a more reasonable time difference,
lilly